Welcome

Do you ever hear people say things, or have people say things to you, and think "what the????? I cant believe that person just said that??" Well that's me, in my life, every day! I think the places I've lived have contributed to some of the things I've heard (Jo'burg, Dagenham...) Anyway, I decided to share some of the comments that have amused me the most. I hope you enjoy the things these people said as much as I did! x Lebo x

Heard in South Africa

This is a collection of some, but by no means all, of the funniest things I've heard during my time in South Africa.

“Hello bums”- Man in the street to me. Also nurse to my friend.

"Recycling? HAIBO! I dont do such things" - Taxi driver on being asked about his green credentials.

“Your name is like tinned fish. You can just get it anywhere” My cousin to me, cos my name’s so common.

"Shoot the bastards... and shoot to kill" - former security minister telling calling on police to shoot to kill.

Heard in woolies, killarney, joburg

"Hei! It's so big! And you are so small! But it is sooo nice!" - A granny re: my "bums" whilst she had a good old squeeze!

From my family

"You are doing wrong things" and “You want to play in class? You must go and live in the circus” – My uncle to my cousin.

"I dont want to live in the circus daddy *wail*" My 11 year old cousin.

“It is unhealthy to sleep past 7 o'clock in the morning” – My uncle to me.

"Ausi Lebo, Tuelo keeps digging her bums. Please make her stop" - My 9 and 11 year old cousins on their 3 year old sister.

From my aunt

"These people don't have moves. They just look like sausages jumping up and down in oil"- My aunt evaluating some people's dancing.

“Why do all models look like horses?" - My aunt.

"She looks like a worm. Or some chewing gum" - My aunt talking about someone on TV.

why??? (more from my family)

"Sometimes it's so good it makes your eyes roll into the back of your head" - my step-mother telling me how great old people sex is



"You are just like a ripe peach....OOOZING with sexuality" - one of my aunts to me

GO OUT YOU BASTARD!

Classic Julius @ a presser

Reporter: " This is rubbish"

Julius: " Rubbish is what you have covered in that trousers....You are a small boy.... GO OUT YOU BASTARD!!!"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EpIcwctC7nQ

BLOODY AGENT! funky house mix

House mix of juju's outburst. "DONT COME HERE WITH THAT TENDANCY...THIS IS NOT A NEWSROOM, THIS IS A REVOLUTIONARY HOUSE" "GO OUT... BASTARD!!!!" http://brentdeluca.posterous.com/julias-malema-agent-remix-0

Seen AND heard in SA

AWB general secretary storms off e-tv debate show

http://www.whiskyroom.co.za/2010/04/awb-sec-general-runs-amok-on-e-tv/

Last few from SA

"JUST DO HIM, DO HIM!" - One of my aunts to my cousin about a hot guy

"Being with stupid people is just debilitating to the mind" - My cousin

"She looks like a witch about to fly off on her broomstick" - My aunt on Tyra Banks and her weave

"You can see that woman's cellulite through her shirt" - My aunt

"HLASELA MA FUTA FOR EVERYOONNNEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" - herbex. It really does attack the fat.

"This is not a newsroom. This is a revolutionary house" - Juju